‘Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive, and will come forth later, in uglier ways.’ Freud
We all like to make fun of Freud, but with this quote, he was spot on. It is such a simple well-known truth, that repressing how we feel about something is dangerous business. Still, this knowledge doesn’t always make it any easier to speak up. Expressing ourselves when what we have to say may cause us or someone else discomfort is so ridiculously difficult- even for the most skilled orators among us.
But Siggy F. is right- what we do not express in a straightforward manner, will come jutting out in some other way, usually a bit more jagged than it was in the first place.
Why do we all let the apple cart of our lives roll down this same hill over and over?? Perhaps because we are stubborn, avoidant creatures by nature—- and tipping our apple carts over is sometimes the only way we will grow.
Ideally, as we evolve we begin to understand the physics of apple carts a bit better. We learn not to do what we used to do when we were youthful and didn’t know better… (Read: we learn not to HEAVE our apple cart down the hill with every ounce of stubborn strength we have) and we instead begin to embrace the scary but necessary art of direct communication.
Speaking what is difficult is never easy, but denying ourselves the expression of what upsets us, always nudges our apple cart to the edge of our lives… and if we stay silent and stew, it takes no time at all for that cart to begin its downward trek. And once it goes over the precipice, it is all but impossible to stop.